EXCERPT
Jewel pictured Matt, muscular frame, thick shoulders, all the makings of a star quarterback, topped with curly red hair. Crap, he was gorgeous. What was she thinking, maybe she shouldn’t end it? “Uh…,”
“You’re scaring me. Talk to me, you know I love you like crazy. When you don’t answer my calls I’m thinking you don’t love me anymore,” Matt sounded almost whiny and she hated when they did that. Whined, cried, and made her feel like a she-witch.
“Well I’ve been busy. You know with the girls and we got here today. And since you … know I’ll be gone all summer maybe we should um take a break?” Jewel cleared her throat, feeling like scum. She should really be a pro at this, but she hated it, especially doing it where she had to hear or see her next victim. And she didn’t want to hurt them, she knew they’d be better off with someone who could really fall in love with them. Not someone like her, someone broken. Some of the guys she’d broken up with would cry, other’s had tried to physically hurt her. She’d learned her lesson and tried to break up in as distant a way as possible. But ending this with Matt now on the phone couldn’t be helped.
“No. I don’t want a vacation from you. I love you. I was thinking about driving up there today. Me and the guys could rent a place nearby. My dad said he’d foot the bill, and since him and my mother split he’ll do anything for me. He even brought me a new convertible, your sexy gold hair would feel good slapping against my face while I drive.” He cleared his throat, “And you’ll be able to ditch your cousin and stay with me – alone.”
Jewel slapped her forehead. Why couldn’t Matt take a hint. “But I, no I don’t think that’s a good idea. My mom barely let me come with Megs and Amy, because she’s so protective and if she knew I was meeting my boyfriend here she’d think you…and I were you know…,” she cleared her throat. Not only that, but being alone with Matt made her feel extremely uncomfortable. The last time they were alone at her house when he popped over unannounced, he’d almost ripped off her shirt fighting her while they kissed in her living room. He’d tried to force her blouse up, and she fighting him to put it down. If Megs hadn’t come over earlier than planned, Jewel didn’t know what would’ve happened. It was then Jewel decided to break it off with Matt.
“Say it? C’mon tell me you love me back and I’ll wait to come up. I kinda feel like, Jewel, I really miss you. And you never tell me you love me back. Yeah, you kiss me, tell me how great a person I am, and things other people don’t even notice about me, but you never seem to … give me part of yourself.” Matt cleared his voice, like he was about to continue.
“It’s because…well, I don’t … I’m not in love with you the way you want me to be. And I’m sorry Matt, I really am, but we need to break up. I can’t do this to you anymore,” Jewel felt like a lowlife. Again and again, she couldn’t give up hope that she’d find someone, somebody out there that her heart connected too. She’d thought it was Matt, felt a little flutter in her tummy when they’d first met, but it died the next day, and by then he’d pressured her to be his girlfriend. And after that, he like all her other ex-boyfriends started to turn scary.
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